Abbott & Costello do computers

FW: Abbott & Costello do computersHope you appreciate the odd joke.  My son and I tried to memorize this a year ago and gave up - Mitchell was getting it, I wasn't - Thanks to Margaret for sending it again. 
I hope you remember Abbott and Costello - Updated "Who's on First? 
Lou Costello Tries to Buy a Computer from Bud Abbott 
ABBOTT (behind the counter at: Super Duper computer store): Can I help you? 
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer. 
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou. 
ABBOTT: Your computer? 
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. 
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou. 
ABBOTT: What about Windows? 
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here? 
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows? 
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows? 
ABBOTT: Wallpaper. 
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. 
ABBOTT: Software for Windows? 
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got? 
ABBOTT: Office. 
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? 
ABBOTT: I just did. 
COSTELLO: You just did what? 
ABBOTT: Recommend something. 
COSTELLO: You recommended something? 
COSTELLO: For my office? 
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office? 
ABBOTT: Office. 
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office! 
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows. 
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, lets just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a my proposal. What do I need? 
ABBOTT: Word. 
COSTELLO: What word? 
ABBOTT: Word in Office. 
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office. 
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows. 
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows? 
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W." 
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "W" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet? 
ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One. 
COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need! 
ABBOTT: Real One. 
COSTELLO: If its a long movie I also want to see reel 2. 3 & 4. Can I watch them? 
ABBOTT: Of course. 
COSTELLO: Great, with what? 
ABBOTT: Real One. 
COSTELLO; OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do? 
ABBOTT: You click the blue "1." 
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what? 
ABBOTT: The blue "1." 
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue "W"? 
ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is Word. 
COSTELLO: What word? 
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows. 
COSTELLO: But there's three words in "office for windows!" 
ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world. 
ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there. 
COSTELLO: And that word is real one? 
ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even part of Office. 
COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping, you have anything I can track my money with? 
ABBOTT: Money. 
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have? 
ABBOTT: Money. 
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money? 
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer. 
COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer? 
ABBOTT: Money. 
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer? 
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge. 
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much? 
ABBOTT: One copy. 
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money? 
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money. 
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money? 
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?? 
ABBOTT: Click on "START".........
  L'il Buddha
  ------ End of Forwarded Message
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