Wording in a child support agreement - Pia Shandel

Hi Dave,
We need your advice.  Here's the story:
Ron has been paying Cdn $1250 per month in child support for his 2 sons since October 1998.  John is 11 & Paul is 6.  They split up when Paul was 8 months old!!!  
In all the time since their settlement agreement, Ron has never screwed his ex out of a dime.  Payments have always been on time with no bounced cheques & no requests to hold the cheque for a few extra days before cashing.  He has every cancelled cheque stapled to every bank statement. Some research I did came back with a startling report.  In BC alone, there are 55,000 "dead beat parents", who owe much & pay nothing.  The Family Maintenance Enforcement Program on average takes well over 2 years to get whichever deadbeat parent in court & even then, the outcome is not always in favour of the kids.
Anyways, of the $1250 Ron pays each month, $329 is designated for daycare & $73 for child counselling.  Ron's youngest son started school this past September & his ex told Ron that John has not been in therapy for about a year.  These two amounts total $402, just shy of 1/3 of his monthly payments!!!  Unfortunately, Ron's ex is a very bitter woman.  She wanted to keep things as they were for the 8 months after they split up ... Ron keeps paying the mortgage, buying & delivering food, pay all the bills & she works barely part-time & complains she needs more-more-more.  She never thought for a second that Ron would divorce her ... they'd been married for 15 years!!!!  Enter me into the mixture 6 months after they split & voila, Ron saw light at the end of a very dismal tunnel.  Making Ron's life as miserable as possible has been her goal since they were divorced in July 2000.  Here's an example:
Ron makes arrangements with his ex to visit his kids.  They set up a day, time & location.  Ron goes to the meeting spot & waits.  And he waits & waits.  The first time she pulled this stunt, he waited almost 3 hours!!!!  Needless to say, Ron was furious that she no showed.  To make matters worse, he went home to a voice message from John saying "Daddy why didn't you come"?  The ex sets Ron up to look like a bad guy.  This has happened over & over.  Ron always sends birthday & Christmas gifts but never gets so much as a thank you.  Very hurtful!!!
The last time, Ron went to the school to meet up with his sons, she greeted him with "You can't be here"  John is so brain-washed.  Recently, Ron told him now that we live close by, we can attend his school plays.  John freaked & started saying "You're not allowed at the school - you have to get Mommy's permission first".  Ron was so pissed-off that he went to the RCMP.  A cop told Ron (off the record) that the next time she pulls this stunt, make sure you have your legal agreement in hand & tell her to call the cops.  The cops would come, read the agreement & enforce it on the spot.
Last week, we went to see a counsellor at the Family Justice Court.  Ron explained about the payments for the daycare & therapy & that he wants the amount reduced.  She told him to come back with 3 years of W2's in hand & that she would look it all over & send the ex a letter.  She'd state that Ron wants the amount reviewed & to respond within 2 weeks.  Ron's gut feeling is that the ex will ignore it & just pour more gas on the fire about how bad Daddy is to the boys.  Every other conversation Ron has with John is started with John asking Ron how much money he makes & that they need more money.  The woman is pure poison!!!!  Can you imagine a 6 year old asking this question???  Ridiculous!!!
Anyways, Ron is going to fax you some of the pages from the Separation & Property Settlement Agreement regarding the money & kids.  What he wants to know is if his ex should be paying tax on part of the child support.  To date, he's paid taxes on the full amount.  He wants to know if she should be paying on some of it, according to the wording of how the money is dispersed.  Also, can any of our home renovation expenses be used to reduce his income?
Thanks for your help Dave ... we want to come see you in action on a Thursday evening, hopefully in the new year.  
Janice :-)
david ingram replies:
The single best Canadian (particularly in BC) to deal with this matter is Carey Linde who has the website www.divorce-for-men.com
It is unlikely that any part of the child support agreement is deductible.  In any agreement made since May, 1997 Child support has been non-deductible to the payer and non-taxable to the recipient by specific law.
In addition, any previous agreement (where the amount was deductible) which has an any part of it changed, now reverts to a non-deductible agreement.  This also matches US law and you are in the US.  Even if he had an old 1995 agreement, the amount would not be deductible on a US return.
Changing to get rid of the child counseling part is a mute point.  If the kids are already poisoned against their father, his action to reduce an amount will be documentary evidence to the children that he "is" trying to take money away from them.  In addition, the judge or the authority would likely just change one of the other amounts to eat it up.  For instance, if Ray;s income has gone up, the new guidelines would likely give more non-deductible money. An aside on my part is that he might want to pay a little more by sending a $10.00 or $15.00 a month cheque to them in their names as an allowance from Dad. (check with Carey;s office first).
Carey Linde's goal and role in life is to get custody and access for fathers.  He has heard this story a thousand times.  He even has support groups which Ray might want to attend once in a while.
Read Carey's website.  His assistants name is Greg Armstrong, feel free to talk to him if Carey is busy and they are both very busy.  I am NOT suggesting that you call Carey's office to reduce or change the support.  I AM suggesting that you could use his office for better enforcement for access to his children.
IT IS TOO BAD YOU CAN'T LISTEN TO CFUN RIGHT NOW.  PIA SHANDEL is doing a show on MARRIAGES from HELL as I write this. Well, of course you can by dialing into www.cfun.com
You might also want to pick up a book called "DIVORCE FROM HELL" by Wendy Dennis.  There are similarities to your situation in this book and it is a well written documentary about a wife who poisoned the kids against the father, etc., etc..
I am going to strip all identifying marks out of this and make it a newsletter. It is an important subject.
Ask an International  real estate mutual funds  immigration Divorce income tax expert  experts - David Ingram 's Services North Vancouver BC Canada  Fred Snyder 's CKBD AM600 Radio Show
Answers to this and other similar  questions can be obtained free on Air every Sunday morning.
Every Sunday at 9:00 AM on 600AM in Vancouver, Fred Snyder of Cartier Partners and I will be hosting an INFOMERCIAL but LIVE talk show called "ITS YOUR MONEY"
Those outside of the Lower Mainland will be able to listen on the internet at
Local phone calls to (604) 280-0600 - Long distance calls to 1-866-778-0600. 
Old shows are archived at the site.
This from ask an income tax immigration planning and bankruptcy expert consultant guru or preparer  from www.centa.com or www.jurock.com or www.featureweb.com. Canadian David Ingram deals daily with tax returns dealing with expatriate:
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